There always seems to come times in my life where I honestly wonder, is this worth trying for? It happens in relationships, work, friends, and many other things. It is something that I struggle with, trying to recognize what is really something that will benefit me or what is something that might just bring me down.
This move to Seattle was a huge choice. That was something I really thought about and contemplated whether it was worth the move or not. So far it has been completely worth it. Then there was the split with my ex and whether or not it was worth trying again for, that ended up being shot down and we quickly realized that wouldn't work.
My latest battle is whether some of the dates I have been on are worth anything more than just a date. Most of the guys are great people, someone I could see myself being good friends with. A few are assholes that I have to just cut from my life. Then there is the much hated friend zone dates. The people you date that deserve a great girlfriend because they are nice, stable, and just real people; but no matter how you look at the person you see no physical or mental connection, not an ounce of chemistry. This drives me insane! I seem to cling to the selfish, egotistical man that could care only about himself and cares more about his personal belongings than having an actual relationship/friendship with anyone. This describes my man hunting skills.
So then I run into the guy that is just a down to earth, nice guy and there is no attraction. Why? I feel like I am the reason for the stereotype "girls date the bad boys". So maybe Mr. Nice guy will not be the right guy for me? Although, I keep wanting someone that can treat me right. So I give the "nice guys" a chance, thinking just maybe something will spark and that maybe this feeling just takes time, but its so uncomfortable and awkward. It becomes one of the underlining questions, "is it really worth trying?"
My friends advice on the situation is usually if you don't like him just tell him and leave it at that. My question is, what if there could be something more? I have seen many people who meet someone they don't see themselves with and in the end they fall madly in love and can't spend their lives without the other person. So if I walk away from these "nice guys" and not give them a chance, will I be missing out?
It definitely isn't an easy question to answer, because giving them a chance could lead them to think I am using them for free dinner or a free date. This is not something I want to be portrayed as, although I don't mind the free meals and date, it's just not my intention.
I guess that question, "is it worth it?" will just always linger until I actually give someone a chance and see where things can lead.